The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize