In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
