Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
organizing the empties. That sober.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
