i was born a porn star she said
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
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