Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
