I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Randomize
