and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
