She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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