just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
