do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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