i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Randomize