YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
