Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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