I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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