We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Randomize