Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize