D3 body, D1 cock
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
