It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
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