I hope mine doesn't look like that
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
