I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
After last night, I could never be a politician.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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