I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Randomize
