I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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