We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
