fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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