i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
dude i'm inner monologue high
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize