Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Randomize
