It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize