His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
