How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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