I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
