She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
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