She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
