How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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