these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize