Porn is love you can see.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
