youre lurking in front of me
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
This is the prime rib incident all over again
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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