sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize