Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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