singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Randomize