Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
