Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
she looked like the before picture.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
