Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
