Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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