Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Too much gin, very little bucket
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize