HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
