$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
