You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
