Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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