i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
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