shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I look excited, but its just a facade.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
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