I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
