but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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